A Yolk with Chronic Laziness and a Horrible Attitude.
For international news, Hello Kitty has been replaced by Gudetama, an anthropomorphic egg yolk who hates to do anything but sleep. His super powers include being unmotivated, whiny, maintaining a face of despair and knowing his only purpose in life is to be eaten. Society has been looking for a replacement for Bad-Body-Image-Barbie and a superhero that Ben Affleck can’t butcher – Gudetama fits in with Brunch-obsessed, permanently displeased and overall slothful twenty somethings and offers an effortlessly approachable role model.
In 2013, Sanrio placed twenty characters in front of an audience at a product expo in Japan and held a popularity contest in order to choose their next big star. Gudetama beat out a feisty onion, a bread shaped panda, a sad tofu cube and a salmon fillet (who thankfully still got produced) due to the fact that his lethargic and apathetic nature was relatable. He lies around in bed all day and generally won’t move unless prodded with a giant pair of sticks. He can’t be bothered to cover his naked body even when facing imminent doom. It’s kind of adorable. But how will this affect future generations of adults? It’s too early to tell. Gudetama seems to be a manifestation of Basic Girls everywhere who regularly “can’t even”, but let’s consider his 80s/90s counterpart, My Little Ponies. These mystical creatures have shown serious effects on populations who are now adults who vote for our politicians. Unfortunately I just wasted an hour of my morning googling this…Bronies, men who love My Little Ponies, are a well-organized and strong global group, with BronyCon occurring every year. I really can’t put Bronies into words so if you have a minute, look for yourself. But hey, glass half full, mythical rainbow horses and comatose eggs are better role models than Lance Armstrong, Bratz Dolls and Chris Brown.