Bemelmans Bar in the Carlyle Hotel As many in the world dive into Dry January, the time of the year when other's deafeningly silent egotistical health kicks cast a crescendo of shame over your martini habit, plunge friendships into turmoil as the fundamental cornerstone is removed, and pour gasoline over the already-smoldering post-holiday … [Read more...]

A Shrimp Cocktail Crawl Around Downtown Manhattan I hereby decree that we, the millennial womenfolk, have reached a verdict on our decision regarding what food we will shamelessly obsess over, order in hazardous excess, waterboard our social media followers with troves of, and consume until it becomes a facet of our psyche. Avocado Toast, … [Read more...]

Barney Greengrass on the Upper West Side Diners are a magical blip in dietary reality where it becomes seemingly fine to eat things that 1) have been demonized by every diet known to man 2) you would never cook yourself, partially out of shame and partially out of (albeit fleeting) self-respect 3) your body can't handle like it once … [Read more...]

New York's Newest Tex-Mex Star, Yellow Rose Similar to how now we look at the blithe use of asbestos all across America before 1980s with belittling judgement, I've recently been ruminating on the sustenance that fueled our growing bodies during the most crucial years of development with the same disparaging sense of awe. As we now live in … [Read more...]

Dame, Where I Spent Too Much in 2021 as Far as My Accountant Is Concerned ^ Paying homage to the now-out-of-season Cucumber Salad with Smoked Mussels & Dill bathed in an emulsified mussel sauce that I will serve as a soup at my highly improbable future wedding Things Customers Said To Me When I Waitressed at an Overpriced Seafood … [Read more...]