So I Signed My Lease/Closed on My Apartment…Now What?
^ An important life milestone is when you find that family heirloom piece you will torture future generations with by demanding in your will that relatives pass it around yearly to display in the focal point of their home.
In a city where people fear commitment more than Catholics fear God (I can say this as a Boston Irish Catholic with a lifelong albatross of crippling guilt), let’s rank levels of commitment our generation dreads, in increasing order of anxiety inducing:
1. Tattoos
2. Pets
3. Hairstyles
4. Plants that require frequent watering
5. Monogamy
6. Couches and other large, expensive furniture
7. Moving, be it for a rental or a purchase
For each time you successfully move apartments, I think the city should issue a Girl-Scout’esque patches as tributes to your suffering. Patches will be for things like: “Moved and didn’t get bed bugs after”, “Moved and didn’t throw out my back even though I’m over 30 now”, “Moved and remembered to forward my mail”. When you sign your lease or close on a home, the Pandora’s Box of things you need to do rips open and ultimately some things fall through the cracks . There’s a laundry list to tackle so we’ll cover this together since I just moved; while my apartment aesthetic is some strange blend of someone’s basement in the 1970s and a Wes Anderson wet dream, it’s habitable, which is a start.
^ So I complained to everyone that it took me a full week to pack my apartment. In actuality, I spent 5 solid days exactly like this, rotating between trying on all of my 30 halloween costumes, reading my tarot cards that I forgot I owned, and going through my high school year books.
Regardless if you’re purchasing or renting, the things you need to think about:
1. ConEd Con Ed covers your cooking gas and electricity, which you and mostly everyone else in NYC is responsible for (as heat and hot water are more often than not included in your rent/maintenance). Go online and set up your service to begin on your lease start date so that your legal occupancy is covered.
2. Spectrum Spectrum is most likely your internet and cable provider. Give them a ring if you chose to have one or both….or if you plan to go the Amish route, don’t call them. Every building in New York is wired for Spectrum; most are not set up for Verizon. For the chosen few who have Verizon, continue to gawk at us peasants and you can google “Verizon” yourself on your reliable connection.
3. United States Postal Service If you’re currently living in the city and switching addresses, you’ll need to actually file for a change of address at the USPS so they can forward your mail from your previous home. It takes about 2 weeks for your mail to get actively forwarded so do this as soon as you can – it’s quite easy online. Also, they send you a BUNCH of actually useful (from a new home perspective) coupons; who doesn’t love a 20% off a Bed, Bath & Beyond that magically can’t expire?
4. The Department of Motor Vehicles Ugh the DMV…just typing this gives me PTSD to the three times I failed my driving test. But beyond that. You should most likely change your license to reflect your new address because that is a responsible, adult thing to do. Your parents would be proud. They also give you a ton of killer coupons – who says the government isn’t watching out for us? But please ask me how many Lowe’s coupons I have in my wallet right now.
5. The Department of Sanitation If you’re not planning to take any furniture or mattresses with you to your next home, you best believe you can incur a massive fine for just leaving those out on the sidewalk. Not only for city cleanliness, but everyone is terrified of sidewalk mattresses, mainly due to omnipresent and crippling fear of bed bugs. When you know your move out date, go on the Department of Sanitation website, file for what type and how many pieces of furniture you’ll be leaving on the sidewalk, and they’ll come the following morning so you don’t get hit with a penalty/ruin the lives of all the passerbys.
6. On the note of how to dispose of a mattress…FYI you can get fined for improper disposal of a mattress, mainly because of that aforementioned citywide fear of bed bugs.
- Schedule a mattress pick up with the Department of Sanitation
- Buy one of these mattress bags on Amazon to seal up your mattress in before lugging it out to the sidewalk
7. Homeowner’s or Renter’s Insurance For renters, landlords won’t require renter’s insurance but they’ll strongly encourage that you get it. For owners, coops and condos will require it, as will the bank if you’re financing. Definitely look into different options – it’s all very affordable and usually protects much more than you think. Example, (well, dark example) if you ever get mugged like yours truly did, you’re covered!
8. What should you do with your unwanted belongings? While I know the thought of donating unused items is all good and dandy, the actual act of it unfortunately is kind of a complete pain when you live in the city and don’t have a car to transport bags of items easily. While there’s no getting around the inconvenience of it all, less fortunate individuals in the city could benefit from your bit of extra effort. Curbed put together a nice piece detailing where to donate clothes, furniture, electronics, books, and just about everything.
9. Other places your should be contacting that may legitimately want to know where you live
- Your bank/credit card agency
- The tax agencies
- Social security
- Your employer
- Loan providers
- Insurance providers (health, car, life, ect.)
- Any subscriptions you have
- All your online shopping sites you frequent (it’s suprisingly easy to place an order quickly and forget to update you address)
- Voter registration
- Any streaming services
- Mapping services and car services (you don’t want to have a few drinks and go to the wrong default for “home”)
- Doctors, dentists, lawyers, ect.
10. Make copies of your keys – and keep one at your office If you live alone, with a significant other, or with roommates, the most frustrating and powerless position is when you’ve lost your keys or locked yourself out of your apartment with the keys inside. If you have a super-in-the-building or doorman, life is a bit easier. However, if the super or landlord isn’t close by, this can turn into a long affair. I always keep a copy of my apartment keys somewhere hidden on my desk so if god-forbid I get locked out, I know there’s another set that I can get without bothering anyone.