The time we taste tested 5 tequilas on a Sunday night
Lol how optimistic we were.
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In my early 20’s, I waitressed at a Mexican restaurant that revealed my lack of portion control does in fact reach into the darker realms of carnitas and tequila. So as you can imagine, overdoing it on either of those items has very grave effects on the body: that being fat and drunk. Carnitas and I have since then decided it was best to leave our love in the past, however my romance with tequila has become something storybook…not always pretty or proud, but a story nonetheless. Our restaurant was actually incredible and we had a pretty extraordinary array of tequilas in-house. During our five days of training, each night ended with the bartender having us try a dozen or so tequilas so we could know the entire bar…this led to an impromptu 5 day bender which I recently replicated with one of my closest friends, Sam.
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For this Sunday night of Salsa and Shame, we got some vegan Mexican food from my neighborhood staple, Jajaja, and then had ourselves a kiddie pool of tequila.
So my favorite age of tequila is reposado (see a bit later in the post for differences in ages) so we went for four different reposados and a mezcal for good measure.
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There was one, simple rule to the game: we had to drink everything.
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To give this some structure, there were three questions to ponder in reflection later:
Question 1: any residual thoughts about this tequila?
Question 2: for what occasion would you drink this?
Question 3: if one singer was this tequila, who would it be and why?
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So we started off the night with Milagro Reposado, a 100% blue agave tequila that rings in at $32. It’s aged in American Oak Barrels, has a very clean agave forward taste, and is highlighted by notes of caramel.
From my chicken scratch notes: smells like a margarita, smooth, no after burn, sweet, dangerously good
Q1:
Sam: Surprisingly astounding, I found myself going to three different liquor stores looking for this at the Jersey Shore last weekend
Liz: So I remember Milagro being a good tequila, but this is excellent, especially to sip
Q2:
Sam: Sitting on a porch in a rocking chair OR just any time I physically get the chance
Liz: This is an excellent substitute for water or iced coffee
Q3:
Sam: Santana. Smooth.
Liz: David Matthews Band, a dependable classic you know will always go down easy
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Next on the list was Cazadores Reposado, a 100% blue agave tequila that will cost you about $27. It’s aged for just over 2 months in virgin oak barrels and is highlighted by the warmth of cinnamon and huge notes of white and black pepper. A massively spicy tequila.
From my chicken scratch notes: alcohol forward, nail polish, drying out my tongue, making bad choices, regret, we completed our entire astrological birth charts
Q1:
Sam: It made me feel like it was drying up all moisture in my body
Liz: You know when you squeeze a cotton ball and your body recoils in a resounding, visceral reaction. That.
Q2:
Sam: A cheap pickleback shot, where I couldn’t taste it hardly at all
Liz: When I’m looking to unleash the crazy, paragraph-texting demon from within…so 11am Sunday brunch in a Bloody Maria
Q3:
Sam: Someone with a shitty raspy voice like Miley Cyrus
Liz: Pitbull, you keep trying to like it but then you hear “Mr. 305” and throw up a little bit
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Third, we moved to the Mezcal, Mina Real Reposado, made from agave that’s steam-roasted in low-pressure brick ovens and co-fermented with crushed piña fiber and will set you back about $45. It’s a more floral spirit with notes of citrus and vanilla.
From my chicken scratch notes: Mexican Everclear, bloody aftertaste, Sam just took 25 minutes to explain the entire plot of the Phantom of the Opera
Q1:
Sam: Death
Liz: I think this is what the Catholic Church uses for exorcisms
Q2:
Sam: Never
Liz: I will use this to poison people I don’t like who force themselves into my apartment
Q3:
Sam: Eminem – super aggressive for no reason
Liz: Nickleback, specifically “Photograph”, it’s an overwhelming uncomfortable song about regret, which is pretty fitting
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Somehow we made it to my go-to favorite, Corralejo Reposado, concocted from 100% blue agave and which clocks in at $34. It’s aged in French, American and White Oak ex-bourbon barrels, and has a crazy range of notes from smoke, to mushrooms, to cinnamon, to vanilla. It’s meant to be enjoyed neat.
From my chicken scratch notes: mothers milk, wholesome, we FaceTimed Sam’s parents in Louisville (~10:20pm) then played shut-the-box dice game for 10 minutes in complete silence
Q1:
Sam: Comforting and warm
Liz: Both I and society-in-general wished I liked this less
Q2:
Sam: When I want to show off my newly-gained tequila knowledge
Liz: I drink this constantly so will carry on with my questionable decision making self
Q3:
Sam: Buddy Guy – Cool jazz, calm and collected yet impressive
Liz: Drake, a velvety dream that you’re proud to tell people you’re completely obsessed with
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Last, thank god, was my old Mexican restaurant’s house tequila, Espolon Reposado, made from 100% blue agave and costing about $50. It’s also aged in New American barrels and is know for a bold, round taste, with a hint of caramel and a long spicy finish.
From my chicken scratch notes: (emptiness) and something about textually ending it with guy who asked Sam out over the Lyft app. Phones should’ve been away at this point.
Q1:
Sam: I wasn’t ready for the game
Liz: I think I was chasing this with hummus I found…so strong note of chickpeas
Q2:
Sam: The game minus the 4 tequilas before
Liz: Not a casual Sunday at 11:10pm after previously swallowing four mugs of other tequilas
Q3:
Sam: Luke Bryan – I got too drunk before his concert and don’t remember any of his performance
Liz: Garth Brooks’ “I have Friends in Low Places” – I know this song by heart but have no conscious recollection of singing it. If that makes sense.
^So this is about how well four hours of drinking my heavy pours of tequila went. Monday was horrible. Just how I anticipate May 6th will feel. Since after Cinco De Mayo 2018 we won’t see another Saturday Cinco until 2029, please pick your poison wisely and enjoy this holiday to it’s fullest.
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!!! fun facts !!!
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Tequila is typically offered in three different agings, that increase in price respectively: Blanco, Resposado and Anejo
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Blanco – “White” tequila. Though it’s sometimes bottled almost immediately after its final distillation, blanco tequila is held in stainless steel, oak or other kinds of containers for less than 60 days. Some distillers call blanco “the essence of tequila.”
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Reposado – “Rested” tequila. Reposados are typically aged at least 60 days but can go up to one year, usually in American oak barrels. Many favor reposado tequilas over anejos, arguing that this category’s shorter barrel-aging mellows the tequila without overwhelming the distinctive aroma and flavor of agave.
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Anejo – “Aged” tequila. You’ll find anejos aged from one to three years in American or other oak barrels (occasionally, ones that are recycled after aging bourbons). Aficionados who appreciate the mellow temperament consider anejos the true “sipping” tequila.
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