Yolks >> Folks ^Breakfast is like a pregame for the day Good Thanks' Avocado Toast with lemon, smoked sea salt, ground pepper, and microgreens on sourdough … [Read more...]
Things I’ve Heard My Friends Say About Their Dates or Real Amazon.com Reviews of Crock Pots?
1. "It abruptly stopped working. No petering out/gradually getting weaker, just one day it worked and the next it didn't." 2. "If you appreciate functional simplicity, you'll love this." 3. "This would be great for people who work and still want a tasty meal when they come home." 4. "I use it, travel with it, store it.. unless you're dropping … [Read more...]
Kids Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Get Their License Until They’ve Beat Rainbow Road in Mario Kart
Would've saved my parents a lot in insurance premium increases ^Every shooting star you see at night is a racer falling off Rainbow Road Fortnite concerns me as an adult woman with no children who just so happens to follow a lot of NBA players and rappers that I know are playing. Judging by the fact that you would think I bet the mortgage to … [Read more...]
“I’m going to ‘X’ neighborhood, what should I do?”
Say hello to your tour guide...Jesus, take the wheel. If you know me well, you know my text response time is absolutely horrible. I get a lot of things like "Who should I call if my light bulb went out", "I lost my keys", and "(many expletives) I FOUND A COCKROACH (more expletives)", to which I attempt to swallow all sarcasm before letting my … [Read more...]
“Things No One Ever Thinks About”
^ Tribeca circa sometime in the 1700's. WILD. If anyone else hasn't caught on to this yet, this newsletter has largely become an excuse for me to succumb to all of my absurd curiosities in the name of investigative journalism. This has a caveat as I'm easily distracted so fear the day anyone looks at my google history. Apparently scientists are … [Read more...]
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