Where’s It From: Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire or Your Long Weekend Home for Thanksgiving?

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Surviving Penn Station During the Holiday Rush Is on Par With Any Triwizard Tournament Task ^ after passing on the stuffing, a nosey relative behind you showily asks why and you quietly offer that gluten doesn't sit well with you, to which you are viciously attacked by your "celiac is a myth and millennials are the root of all of the evil in … [Read more...]

Real Estate Questions I Get Asked at Inopportune Times

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"A Coop Is Like a Condo Except Your Neighbors Are Completely Insane and They Also Interview You, Right?" ^ me, trying to sound cheery while announcing to my buyers the next horrific step on deck in their quest to purchase a coop "Oompa loompa doompety doo Is this medieval and antiquated form of ownership for you Oompa loompa doompety … [Read more...]

Somewhere in New York I’m Going to Kick Myself for Telling People About Because Then It Will Become Impossible to Go To

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Jolene in Noho for Their Brunch ^ anything on top of a bed of delicately fluffy ricotta is basically boudoir Things that give me disabling anxiety: Turbulence on airplanes (I've cried into the chest of the stranger next to me)Videos of mother birds pushing their babies out of the nest so they learn to fly (it's niche)Folding laundry only … [Read more...]

Painfully Awkward Silence With a Relative This Holiday Season?

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Behold! A Cornucopia of Useless Yet Fascinating Stories Warning: this section is simply an amalgam of everything I've gone down a wormhole researching (yes, calling it research does feel generous) and now I'm trying to relabel it as time well spent. I spend more time than I probably should considering what the NSA agent assigned to me truly … [Read more...]